Three rough looking bikers stroll into a truck stop where a grizzled old-timer is having breakfast. One of the bikers extinguishes his cigarette in the old guy's pancakes. Another spits a wad of chewing tobacco in his coffee and the third biker dumps his whole plate on the floor. Without a word of protest, the old guy pays his bill and leaves. "Not much of a man, was he?" says one of the bikers. "Not much of a driver either," says the waitress. "He just backed his truck over three motorcycles." ___________
Cold in July in San Francisco ________________________ Attn: Mu Phi Kaps Are you in this photo?
If you're a 1965 Phi Kappa Sigma from Tulane, or thereabouts, we're looking for you. Go to my "NEWS" page for a name list and more info. * NEWS * The Phi Kap Current Directory (Click to download) (Last updated 10/23/09) _____________________________
Will I die, God? In surgery for a heart attack, a middle-aged woman has a vision of God by her bedside. "Will I die, she asks?"
God says, "No. You have thirty more years to live."
With thirty years to look forward to, she decides to make the best of it. So since she's in the hospital, she gets breast implants, liposuction, a tummy tuck, hair transplants, and collagen injections in her lips. She looks great!
The days she's discharged, she exits the hospital with a swagger, crosses the street and is immediately hit by a bus and killed.
Up in heaven, she sees God. "You said I had thirty more years to live," she complains.
Quote of the day: "Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying around in hospitals dying of nothing."
FORGIVING the TERRORISTS: In an interview,General Norman Schwarzkopfwas asked if he thoughtthere was room for forgivenesstoward the people who have harboredand abetted the terrorists who perpetratedthe 9/11 attacks on America.
His answer was classic Schwarzkopf.The General said,"I believe forgiving them is God's function. OUR job is to arrange the meeting."
"Good Luck, Mr. Gorsky" ON JULY 20, 1969, AS COMMANDER OF THE APOLLO 11 LUNAR MODULE, NEIL ARMSTRONG WAS THE FIRST PERSON TO SET FOOT ON THE MOON.HIS FIRST WORDS AFTER STEPPING ON THE MOON, 'THAT'S ONE SMALL STEP FOR MAN, ONE GIANT LEAP FOR MANKIND,' WERE TELEVISED TO EARTH AND HEARD BY MILLIONS.
BUT JUST BEFORE HE RE-ENTERED THE LANDER, HE MADE THE ENIGMATIC REMARK 'GOOD LUCK, MR. GORSKY.'
MANY PEOPLE AT NASA THOUGHT IT WAS A CASUAL REMARK CONCERNING SOME RIVAL SOVIET COSMONAUT.HOWEVER, UPON CHECKING, THERE WAS NO GORSKY IN EITHER THE RUSSIAN OR AMERICAN SPACE PROGRAMS.
OVER THE YEARS MANY PEOPLE QUESTIONED ARMSTRONG AS TO WHAT THE 'GOOD LUCK, MR. GORSKY'... STATEMENT MEANT, BUT ARMSTRONG ALWAYS JUST SMILED.
ON JULY 5, 1995, IN TAMPA BAY , FLORIDA , WHILE ANSWERING QUESTIONS FOLLOWING A SPEECH, A REPORTER BROUGHT UP THE 26- YEAR-OLD QUESTION TO ARMSTRONG. THIS TIME HE FINALLY RESPONDED.
MR. GORSKY HAD DIED, SO NEIL ARMSTRONG FELT HE COULD NOW ANSWER THE QUESTION.
IN 1938, WHEN HE WAS A KID IN A SMALL MID-WEST TOWN , HE WAS PLAYING BASEBALL WITH A FRIEND IN THE BACKYARD. HIS FRIEND HIT THE BALL, WHICH LANDED IN HIS NEIGHBOR'S YARD BY THEIR BEDROOM WINDOW.HIS NEIGHBORS WERE MR. AND MRS. GORSKY.
AS HE LEANED DOWN TO PICK UP THE BALL, YOUNG ARMSTRONG HEARD MRS. GORSKY SHOUTING AT MR. GORSKY.
'SEX! YOU WANT SEX?! YOU'LL GET SEX WHEN THE KID NEXT DOOR WALKS ON THE MOON!'
TRUE STORY
YouTube Movies (Click the arrows in lower right corner to see more thumbnails then click a thumbnail to play it.) SAN FRANCISCO BAY SAILING ON A 41-ft KETCH
Gracie is really glad to see us when we get back from a trip. This was taken shortly after our arrival home from Cape Hatteras and Duck:
I got back July 12th from a visit with my Aunt and Uncle in Rice Lake, Wisconsin. This is the view from their screened in porch overlooking the lake.
A guy goes into his doctor and says "Give it to me straight, Doc. I know I'm sick. How long do I have?" The doctor says, "Ten ... " "Ten what?", asks the patient. "Ten years? Ten months?" "Nine, eight, seven ..." "Faith means making a virtue out of not thinking. And it's nothing to brag about" -- Bill Maher
A guy spots a sign outside a house that reads "Talking Dog for Sale." Intrigued he walks in. "So what have you done with your life?" he asks the dog.
"I've led a very full life," says the dog. "I lived in the Alps rescuing avalanche victims. Then I served my country in Iraq. And now I spend my days reading to the residents of a retirement home."
The guy is flabbergasted. He asks the dog's owner, "Why on earth would you want to get rid of an incredible dog like that?"
The owner says, "Because, he's a liar. He never did any of that." _____________________________________________________________________________ Last year, Jill's son, Colin, died suddenly October 2008 Colin was an talented artist who had a broad spectrum of styles and techniques. His work ranged from the elegantly simple to the poignancy of emotion shown in his windswept hair sketches. You can see photos of Colin or an animated movie of his work by clicking the buttons below.
Family Tree page600+ name list. Kyles/Snells/Smatlaks/Cranes/Styles/Burnson Skamsers, Syversens and others in Norway. The Kyle - Snell Family Tree is now on http://www.ancestry.com with over 500 photos
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